“Iron sharpens iron” is often used to describe men’s relationships. But what’s it really mean?

When something is sharpened, something hard pushes against something as hard or harder. The resistance rubs off the spots that are in the way of a fine edge. Sometimes sparks fly. But there has to be some push back.

In 1989 the Chinese government sent tanks to put down a protest in Tiananmen Square. Because of the relationship begun 17 years earlier, Nixon met with Deng Xiaoping to stress the damage done to US-China relations. Deng didn’t like it. A few months later Nixon wrote him a letter saying, in part, “You know I’m a friend. So listen to me when I tell you that you screwed up big-time, and that you have work to do to fix it” (https://www.wsj.com/articles/nixon-now-more-than-ever-1543276780).

In his book Further Up the Organization, Robert Townsend – the head of Avis Rent-A-Car when they had their “We Try Harder” campaign – says, “Billy Graham had a man named Grady Wilson who yelled ‘Horsesh…’ – however you say that in Baptist – at him whenever he took himself too seriously. Perhaps that’s one of the reasons the Graham organization has been so successful.”

“Yes men” give no push back. Speaking the truth in love is part of risk management – reputation risk; as well as operational risk. You need people who are willing to give you the bad news. About a program, a process, finances, or whatever.

Do you have a bad news bearer?